Why Shrink?

I have been overweight all my life. I don't ever remember a time when I would have been qualified to hold the titles "skinny," "thin," "small," or if I'm honest, "healthy." I broke my femur when I was 8 which for those of you who don't know, is the strongest and thus hardest bone in your body to break. I did it again when I was 12. Perhaps the breaks where not caused by my weight but they certainly did not help me get healthy. To the contrary, they only amplified my already sedentary lifestyle.

Two years ago today I married my best friend, the most Godly woman I know and one day the mother of my children. People don't lie when they tell you that getting married often results in weight gain and there was no exception in my case. Unfortunately my already sedentary life magnified and to my dismay it transferred to my bride.

A long time ago I had given up on ever getting healthy. I had tried diets, all sorts. My favorite, being an avid carnivore, was the Low Carb diet which let you eat all the meat and cheese you could handle. Unfortunately I am also an avid pizza-vor and to my surprise a month of eating nothing but bacon and cheese does actually get old. I realize now that it didn't help that mentally I always viewed those months as diets which, if I am honest, I never expected to last. I wanted to lose some weight and maintain it, yes, but I never expected my lifestyle to change, never expected to get healthy, never expected to become that which I had never been, small, skinny, healthy.

A few months ago that changed. I wish I was a better husband and could say that my motivation for getting healthy was wanting to grow old with my wife. Certainly I want to do that, more than many things, but I am still in my 20's and think I am invincible so getting into better shape does not seem like it will extend my life expectancy. I wish I could say I was motivated to do it for my future kids so I can play with them when they are growing up, to ensure that I am around for them to see them graduate, to walk my daughter down the wedding aisle, to hold my first grandchild. While I recognize both of these and while they both played some part in my decision they were honestly not enough on their own to make me make what I thought to be an impossible change. Again, I have never thought I could be successful.

So, back to the title, why shrink? As the title suggests I am a pastor. Currently I am ordained working as the Executive Pastor at a church plant in Concord, North Carolina. I believe that God has called me to plant a church in Greensboro, NC in the near future. One day a few months ago I was convicted. I recognized that Biblically my complacency about being unhealthy was sinful and if I was choosing to live a life of sin I did not feel fit to lead God's people.

On this Paul says in 1 Corinthians 9:25-27:

Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

Proverbs 23:20-21 says:

Do not join those who drink too much wine
       or gorge themselves on meat, 

 for drunkards and gluttons become poor,
       and drowsiness clothes them in rags.

Phillipians 3:17-21 says:

Join with others in following my example, brothers, and take note of those who live according to the pattern we gave you. For, as I have often told you before and now say again even with tears, many live as enemies of the cross of Christ. Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things. But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.

All of this to say that a few months ago I started Weight Watchers. They say it is good to document your weight-loss journey so that is what I am going to try to do. When I started a few months ago I was 480 pounds. Yes, I was a big, big unhealthy boy. My body mass index or BMI says that my ideal weight for my height is 205 (that is the high end) but I don't think my frame would allow that. If I can get down to 250 (and have muscles, something I lack right now), I think I would be happy. Ultimately my goal is to be able to go to Cedar Point in Ohio and fit in any seat on the roller coasters, not just the fat man seat. As of now I probably couldn't even fit their. If I were dieting and weighed myself I would have flipped out and probably eaten a pizza. This is not a diet, this is the beginning of a life-long journey, a lifestyle change. I refuse to be my own downfall in ministry. I refuse to the catalyst for getting to spend any less time with my wife or kids.

That is why I must shrink.